One liar humbled by another

Pogo playfulness pales when compared to Peter's pile

It slid out easily, smoothly as my colleague and I sipped our coffees in the sunshine out behind the office – and while each word may not have been exactly a whole new world, there wasn’t a lot of forethought that went into the lie.

“Thanks for the tip,” I said to the rival reporter, doing my best to mask the sharklike quality of my smile.

I wasn’t really thankful of course. The so-called tip he’d passed on to the two of us as he wandered by was for something we’d already covered and followed up two weeks before. But he seemed sincere and I didn’t see a need to burst his bubble and besides, I had a tip to give him in return.

“I guess you’re going to the thing in Qually on Saturday, eh?” I said between sips.

His ears perked up. “What thing?”

“You know, the uh, what is it? The  … uh … Pogo for Priapism.”

“The what?”

“Pogo for Priapism,” I repeated. “It’s a fundraiser for some disease of the week or whatever. I think it starts at 10, but don’t quote me on that. You might want to call the town and check.”

Clearly grateful, my rival went on his way.

Sure enough, my rival proved diligent enough to check the time for the event, but not enough to look up the meaning of what he was asking about.

From all accounts, he had to say it twice.

Yeah, I’m good, but the best? Hardly.  There are some really amazing pros out there who put my picayune triumphs to shame.

Take my personal hero, Defence Minister Peter McKay for instance. Now there’s a guy who really has it going on!

His promise to David Orchard not to merge the Tories with the Canadian Alliance (Reform) Party during the last leadership convention of the Progressive Conservative Party won him the leadership and shortly thereafter he was able to join the Alliance and Progressive Conservative parties into one, a move which eventually led to the election of the Harper government.

High level stuff, but it was only the start.

There’s also the helicopter incident, where McKay used a military chopper to ferry him from a fishing camp and claimed it was part of a search and rescue exercise.

Oh I know, that’s small potatoes next to the Orchard incident, but then there’s the fighter jets.

Now there’s a whopper, telling Canadians during the election  campaign that the F-35s would cost $14 billion when it was really about double that.

A difference in accounting, he said.

Let’s see … good delivery, sticks to his story well, and again, with massive implications for the entire nation.

Nicely done.

It’s humbling really.

 

— Neil Horner is six feet tall and very handsome

 

 

Just Posted

Business increasing in Qualicum Beach, though labour can be hard to find

Business Walk hosted by Chamber of Commerce surveyed 61 businesses

Orca Place residents take time to clean up garbage in Parksville

‘We have to change all these people’s perspectives and outlook on us’

Aid a priority for idled Vancouver Island loggers, John Horgan says

Steelworkers, Western Forest Products returning to mediation

Ravensong Waterdancers bring home provincial awards

Club invited public to watch members perform routine Dec. 15

Parksville and Qualicum Beach looking for firefighters

Those interested can attend regular practice night

VIDEO: These are the top toys this Christmas, B.C. toy experts say

Consider the play value of a game, staff at Toy Traders say

Prince George RCMP use bait packages to catch porch pirates over the holidays

First-in-Canada program with Amazon looks to combat parcel theft

Nanaimo mechanical engineer creates thief tracking program

Nanaimo Thief Tracking lets users plot and share information about thefts online

Mayor wants B.C. to institutionalize severely mental ill people who are homeless

Those suffering from mental health conditions, such as schizophrenia, need specialized care, mayor says

Five things of note from Trudeau’s mandate letters to his ministers

Some marching orders come from the Liberal Party’s campaign, while others are new additions

Scheer’s resignation tips party into internal war over school tuition payments

The Conservatives have a Toronto convention already scheduled for April

Sentencing for B.C. father who murdered two young daughters starts Monday

The bodies of Aubrey, 4, and Chloe, 6, were found in Oak Bay father’s apartment Dec. 25, 2017

Navigating ‘fever phobia’: B.C. doctor gives tips on when a sick kid should get to the ER

Any temperature above 38 C is considered a fever, but not all cases warrant a trip to the hospital

Most Read